Recently

We hoped and prayed and added this little angel to our family:Which you probably already know (but I'm easing into blogging again).

We're crazy about him.

And adoption in general. It has changed our lives. I'll tell you all about it, a little bit at a time. I think I'm finally ready to do that.

A week ago today our adoption was finalized in court. We took an oath, took the stand, testified, signed papers. It was interesting. Made me think a lot about the miracle and blessing and privilege it is to be a parent. He's officially ours; legally Luke Brian Schow. But you know what? He's felt like ours all along. In fact, I hadn't really been anticipating this day much, as far has him becoming part of our family. However it is nice to be able to relax a little more. To take some of the final steps in the official process.

It was a heart-filling day. Sweet and wonderful. A little like Christmas. Lots of excitement and hullabaloo in the morning; lots of sitting and thinking and enjoying all afternoon as a family. I love spending a day apart. A day different from every other day. It was special.He was happy and gooing and cuddly. Adi was excited and lovey as always.

We're so so blessed.

the chickens came first

Look what was waiting for me in the coop this afternoon:

Courtesy of this fine lady (we call her Penelope):

I almost hugged her. Its our first egg.
Ever.

She's been cackling and restless all day. No wonder. I feel like a little kid at Christmas.

And amazed by it all, actually.

Crepe Paper Worries

I told myself this little number would be easy to whip together:

Well, it's not. Isn't it pretty though? This isn't mine, it's Shelly's from House of Smith's.

I have to admit I've spent way more of my life than I'd like to admit putting this little thing together. And it's been occupying my mind. Silly, really.

And it made me think...

When I knelt to pray last night, I thanked Heavenly Father that I can spend my days worrying about crepe paper roses. Not where the next meal will come from, not how I'll keep my family safe or how we'll survive; how i'll make pretty crepe paper roses.

We're so blessed. So so blessed.

Nuts About You Valentine

I didn't know I was so wild about Valentine's Day.

Turns out, I am.

Since having Adi I've realized, or maybe remembered, that there's always something to celebrate, always something to enjoy, get excited about and craft and cook for. I love that about her, and about having a little person in my house.

SO we've read valentine's books, had valentine's cookies, watched valentine's movies. We've cut just about every piece of paper we can find into the shape of a heart. And almost every room in the house has something pink or red on it somewhere.

I really love that we celebrate LOVE on Valentine's. It's nice.

ANYWAY (I'm rambling) what I really wanted to post about was that we made we made some yummy valentines today: Homemade honey roasted peanuts.

I was so fun and simple that I was thinking as I did it, "everyone should do this at least once," so I thought I should share. Here you go!

All you need is some honey, butter, salt, brown sugar and some raw peanuts, shelled and without the skin. Look at this one, dying to be made into a valentine of some sort.

The recipe calls for 1 lb of peanuts, which is about a quart ziploc bag full and makes four snack bags.

Preheat your oven to 325 so it's nice and hot when you're ready to put the peanuts in.

Combine 2 Tbsp honey, 2 Tbsp butter and 3/4 tsp salt in a saucepan over medium heat on the stove. Stir until the butter is melted and the mixture starts to bubble on it's own.

Then dump in the peanuts and stir until they're coated. They won't be dripping in the stuff, just barely covered.
Then pour them into a 9x13" pan and spread them out pretty thin so there's basically just one layer of nuts. Put them right in to the hot oven, and set the timer for 30 minutes. I had a ton of peanuts, so I did a few batches. Some were a full pound and took the entire 30 minutes, but the others had just a little less and were done after about 25. You need to stir them two or three times. Once when the mixture gets kind of soupy and bubbly, then again when they start to darken and roast - just so they all get evenly roasted. If they start to smell even a tiny bit like they might be burning then go ahead and take them out and pour them into a silver bowl. Add 1/3 cup brown sugar and stir until they're coated. I did see a recipe that called for 1/4 tsp of other spices, so if you're into chipotle or cinnamon, mix it with the brown sugar before you stir it into the peanuts. Then spread them out on a sheet of wax paper, breaking up the big clumps so they dry out and cool.
I wish I would have thought ahead and bought some bread bags so I didn't have the zipper on top of the mini snack bags, but they are the perfect size for 1/4 lb of nuts per valentine. I did do a couple sandwich bags full for the grandpas, and they hold a bunch! Then I just made 4x6 labels for the mini bags and 5x7 labels for the big ones in Photoshop with the Wild Love digital kit from The Shabby Princess. I used gluedots to hold them onto the bags because those babies are strong! Wah-Lah. Nuts About you Valentines!

Please, Linny?

According to my 2-year-old, I've been this character for the past ten days. Count them.

Ten.

Thankfully this doesn't just make me a guinea pig, but the daring authority figure and leader (hallelujiah) of the Wonder Pets .

She has assigned herself the role of Ming Ming (the duck with the speech impediment--baby sounding r's) and either her daddy or Hudson are Tuck, the only boy sidekick in the trio.

If you've seen this little gem of television weirdness (created by a man with no children, of course) you'll know that 80% of the dialogue is either sung or said in verse. Which means 80% of what Adi says during the day follows suit.

When it comes from her, it's adorable though.

This morning it was, "Should we watch Linny, Tuck and Ming Ming, too? We're Wonder Pets and we'll help you?" And she's been toddling around singing the theme song.

From our bedroom window she can see the neighbor's horses. I sang (in true Linny style) "It's a baby horse, stuck in the snow. This is serious!"

She followed up (on key no less) "We have to help him!"

Last week I asked her what she wanted for breakfast. "Duck food, Linny!" was her response. Of course. She is a duck after all.

Saturday morning Brent walked into her room. "Where's Linny, Tuck?" was the first thing she said to him that day :)

She'll periodically run up to me during the day with her hands on her cheeks, completely distressed about an animal in trouble somewhere. And she'll ask "Should we save the ______, Linny?" So we rescue the poor pretend creature, or watch that episode (thank you, Netflix Instant Play).

If she needs anything, it's, "PLEASE, Linny?" or "Should we, Linny?"

And we use teamwork no matter what we're playing during the day. She reminds me we're not too big and we're not too tough, but if we work together we've got the right stuff.

Silly girl.

Inbetweenness

September is a daydream. a moment, a breath.

for soaking in summer's last golden sunbeams and cuddling under blankets beneath cool nighttime breezes. for seeing the mountains in amber while the valleys hold their green.

a pause. a still.

an inbetweenness.

and life offers the same--from time to time.

a chance to step back, to exhale--then breath in deeply. time to reflect on what's gone before and what will inevitably come. time to cherish and decide to remember. to savor and enjoy. time to plan and prepare--to look forward. to smile while looking back and wonder while looking ahead. to cherish the past and dream the future in one beautifully blended present.

to be nothing but inbetween.

The Thing About Weeds

the weeds in my driveway have magically reappeared. everything else in my yard is weepy and begging for water--slowly fading from brilliant to blah, even getting a little crispy--

not the weeds.

i ripped those babies out by the roots, and the ones i couldn't get a grip on i dug, poked and pried at.

if i had been treated like that, i'd never come back.

but these things are relentless. they show up in brilliant greens, nice and supple, practically singing.

disgusting.

which confirms the thoughts i had when i attempted to murder them in the first place: some things are always around no matter what, and you can generally expect the same things from them.

with weeds it's itchy eyes, nasty bugs and overgrowth. a marred flower bed, driveway or lawn. and the incessant attempts to be rid of them forever.

i've had a few weedy experiences (obviously with weeds themselves) and with --hate to say it -- weedy people and weedy organizations.

the kind that always find a way to bring something ugly to a beautiful situation. the kind that make a mess in everyone's life--(you can tell by the lives they are no longer allowed into). the kind that just give you the eebie jeebies cause you know there's something creepy hiding deep down. the kind that need very little fuel to prosper in their nastiness. the kind that really can't ever be anything else. because, even though they fool you with their sweet little flowers in the beginning, they will undoubtedly wreak havoc eventually, and never truly change.

but the good thing is, people generally see weeds for what they are. they don't drive past your otherwise lovely yard and scoff at the weeds. they just know weeds happen. that they show up out of nowhere and are a huge pain. that some people just have something nasty to say about everyone, that they cause destruction wherever they go. and people don't take them too seriously, because they have to deal with them too.

so here's to never being weedy.

and to avoiding the nasty things as much as possible.

The best of me

Sundays aren't my favorite.because of all the down time and the 2-4 p.m. what-are-we-gonna-do-now moments.

because those moments always leave me way too wrapped up in my thoughts.

normally a good run shakes me right out of overthinking things, but on sundays my jogging shoes get a break too.

a little self-evalution isn't bad and it seems natural after perspective-refining conversations and lessons at church. but my poor brain just doesn't shut down sometimes. and all to often it gets the best of me.

thankfully i'm married to the most patient, consistent, supportive man i've ever met, and he listens to me ramble. he helps me make sense of what's realistic and what's not, points out the good things i'm thinking and the things that i could probably do without. and my dad's the same way. they really help me filter.

after a good long talk with either of them, i'm usually left with the truth--the lesson that i should keep, the thought that i can build on--and all the anxiety and guilt are washed away. thank heaven for people like that.

and what i came away with yesterday was the realization that i can (and so i should) answer this one tiny question: what gets the best of me?

doesn't it seem like there are so many good, better, great causes? tons of great things to be involved in, to try, to join, to help, to re-create, to change, to start? and there are so many people to be with, to visit, call, help, listen to, talk to, reconnect with, nurture and love?

usually in my effort to do a little of everything, no one person or thing gets my best, leaving me with scraps of unfinished ventures and scattered intentions. which makes me crazy anxious and completely down on myself - missing out on all those good things because i'm at the world's most pathetic pity party.

so i've decided to follow some good advice. to live more in the moment. to focus more on what's happening now, to give the best of me wholly to the things going on and the people right in front of me now. and especially not to let any other moment steal the best of me from this moment. then look back at the past knowing i was fully in each moment, each venture, with each person. that i soaked it all in gave it my best and that i'll do the same in the future.

that i gave the best of me.

Dear Blogger Voice, Come Back....

I'm a phaser. That's pretty much all there is to it. I get into a really good groove, have one or two things on the brain and go like crazy. Then one day I wake up and remember how a month or so ago, I was way in to those one or two things, and it was so wonderful and life was grand, and I really loved it and I was being so consistent, etc. etc.--but now it's been one or two months since I even approached the thing(s).

Ugh.

Luckily, if it's something I really love, it nags at me until I get back into the groove.

So here I am, on one of the miraculous days my child actually sleeps past 7 a.m., when I should be curled up in bed sleeping in (and rejoicing), but the blog nags in my brain knocked me out from under the covers.

When I blog a lot, I start to think in blog. Everything I do is narrated by a little voice in my head in blog language. And I love that. It gives even simple little everyday things a little magic. Like I'm always watching one of my favorite movies, complete with narration.

I miss that little voice. And right now it's missing. So I'm forcing out this post, in the hopes that it will come back.

Dear little voice in my head,

Let's be friends again...it's been a while.

Front Porch Looking In...

I came home from a photo session and saw this little cutie peaking through the window at me...She's way in to her glasses. And says "Woo Woo!" every time she puts them on. Silly.