Life So Sweet

Recently

2011-11-08T09:52:00.000-08:00

We hoped and prayed and added this little angel to our family:Which you probably already know (but I'm easing into blogging again).

We're crazy about him.

And adoption in general. It has changed our lives. I'll tell you all about it, a little bit at a time. I think I'm finally ready to do that.

A week ago today our adoption was finalized in court. We took an oath, took the stand, testified, signed papers. It was interesting. Made me think a lot about the miracle and blessing and privilege it is to be a parent. He's officially ours; legally Luke Brian Schow. But you know what? He's felt like ours all along. In fact, I hadn't really been anticipating this day much, as far has him becoming part of our family. However it is nice to be able to relax a little more. To take some of the final steps in the official process.

It was a heart-filling day. Sweet and wonderful. A little like Christmas. Lots of excitement and hullabaloo in the morning; lots of sitting and thinking and enjoying all afternoon as a family. I love spending a day apart. A day different from every other day. It was special.He was happy and gooing and cuddly. Adi was excited and lovey as always.

We're so so blessed.

the chickens came first

2011-06-23T16:30:00.000-07:00

Look what was waiting for me in the coop this afternoon:

Courtesy of this fine lady (we call her Penelope):

I almost hugged her. Its our first egg.
Ever.

She's been cackling and restless all day. No wonder. I feel like a little kid at Christmas.

And amazed by it all, actually.

Crepe Paper Worries

2011-02-10T08:32:00.000-08:00

I told myself this little number would be easy to whip together:

Well, it's not. Isn't it pretty though? This isn't mine, it's Shelly's from House of Smith's.

I have to admit I've spent way more of my life than I'd like to admit putting this little thing together. And it's been occupying my mind. Silly, really.

And it made me think...

When I knelt to pray last night, I thanked Heavenly Father that I can spend my days worrying about crepe paper roses. Not where the next meal will come from, not how I'll keep my family safe or how we'll survive; how i'll make pretty crepe paper roses.

We're so blessed. So so blessed.

Nuts About You Valentine

2011-02-08T13:34:00.000-08:00

I didn't know I was so wild about Valentine's Day.

Turns out, I am.

Since having Adi I've realized, or maybe remembered, that there's always something to celebrate, always something to enjoy, get excited about and craft and cook for. I love that about her, and about having a little person in my house.

SO we've read valentine's books, had valentine's cookies, watched valentine's movies. We've cut just about every piece of paper we can find into the shape of a heart. And almost every room in the house has something pink or red on it somewhere.

I really love that we celebrate LOVE on Valentine's. It's nice.

ANYWAY (I'm rambling) what I really wanted to post about was that we made we made some yummy valentines today: Homemade honey roasted peanuts.

I was so fun and simple that I was thinking as I did it, "everyone should do this at least once," so I thought I should share. Here you go!

All you need is some honey, butter, salt, brown sugar and some raw peanuts, shelled and without the skin. Look at this one, dying to be made into a valentine of some sort.

The recipe calls for 1 lb of peanuts, which is about a quart ziploc bag full and makes four snack bags.

Preheat your oven to 325 so it's nice and hot when you're ready to put the peanuts in.

Combine 2 Tbsp honey, 2 Tbsp butter and 3/4 tsp salt in a saucepan over medium heat on the stove. Stir until the butter is melted and the mixture starts to bubble on it's own.

Then dump in the peanuts and stir until they're coated. They won't be dripping in the stuff, just barely covered.
Then pour them into a 9x13" pan and spread them out pretty thin so there's basically just one layer of nuts. Put them right in to the hot oven, and set the timer for 30 minutes. I had a ton of peanuts, so I did a few batches. Some were a full pound and took the entire 30 minutes, but the others had just a little less and were done after about 25. You need to stir them two or three times. Once when the mixture gets kind of soupy and bubbly, then again when they start to darken and roast - just so they all get evenly roasted. If they start to smell even a tiny bit like they might be burning then go ahead and take them out and pour them into a silver bowl. Add 1/3 cup brown sugar and stir until they're coated. I did see a recipe that called for 1/4 tsp of other spices, so if you're into chipotle or cinnamon, mix it with the brown sugar before you stir it into the peanuts. Then spread them out on a sheet of wax paper, breaking up the big clumps so they dry out and cool.
I wish I would have thought ahead and bought some bread bags so I didn't have the zipper on top of the mini snack bags, but they are the perfect size for 1/4 lb of nuts per valentine. I did do a couple sandwich bags full for the grandpas, and they hold a bunch! Then I just made 4x6 labels for the mini bags and 5x7 labels for the big ones in Photoshop with the Wild Love digital kit from The Shabby Princess. I used gluedots to hold them onto the bags because those babies are strong! Wah-Lah. Nuts About you Valentines!

Please, Linny?

2011-01-10T07:55:00.000-08:00

According to my 2-year-old, I've been this character for the past ten days. Count them.

Ten.

Thankfully this doesn't just make me a guinea pig, but the daring authority figure and leader (hallelujiah) of the Wonder Pets .

She has assigned herself the role of Ming Ming (the duck with the speech impediment--baby sounding r's) and either her daddy or Hudson are Tuck, the only boy sidekick in the trio.

If you've seen this little gem of television weirdness (created by a man with no children, of course) you'll know that 80% of the dialogue is either sung or said in verse. Which means 80% of what Adi says during the day follows suit.

When it comes from her, it's adorable though.

This morning it was, "Should we watch Linny, Tuck and Ming Ming, too? We're Wonder Pets and we'll help you?" And she's been toddling around singing the theme song.

From our bedroom window she can see the neighbor's horses. I sang (in true Linny style) "It's a baby horse, stuck in the snow. This is serious!"

She followed up (on key no less) "We have to help him!"

Last week I asked her what she wanted for breakfast. "Duck food, Linny!" was her response. Of course. She is a duck after all.

Saturday morning Brent walked into her room. "Where's Linny, Tuck?" was the first thing she said to him that day :)

She'll periodically run up to me during the day with her hands on her cheeks, completely distressed about an animal in trouble somewhere. And she'll ask "Should we save the ______, Linny?" So we rescue the poor pretend creature, or watch that episode (thank you, Netflix Instant Play).

If she needs anything, it's, "PLEASE, Linny?" or "Should we, Linny?"

And we use teamwork no matter what we're playing during the day. She reminds me we're not too big and we're not too tough, but if we work together we've got the right stuff.

Silly girl.

Inbetweenness

2010-09-29T23:34:00.000-07:00

September is a daydream. a moment, a breath.

for soaking in summer's last golden sunbeams and cuddling under blankets beneath cool nighttime breezes. for seeing the mountains in amber while the valleys hold their green.

a pause. a still.

an inbetweenness.

and life offers the same--from time to time.

a chance to step back, to exhale--then breath in deeply. time to reflect on what's gone before and what will inevitably come. time to cherish and decide to remember. to savor and enjoy. time to plan and prepare--to look forward. to smile while looking back and wonder while looking ahead. to cherish the past and dream the future in one beautifully blended present.

to be nothing but inbetween.

The Thing About Weeds

2010-09-27T16:21:00.000-07:00

the weeds in my driveway have magically reappeared. everything else in my yard is weepy and begging for water--slowly fading from brilliant to blah, even getting a little crispy--

not the weeds.

i ripped those babies out by the roots, and the ones i couldn't get a grip on i dug, poked and pried at.

if i had been treated like that, i'd never come back.

but these things are relentless. they show up in brilliant greens, nice and supple, practically singing.

disgusting.

which confirms the thoughts i had when i attempted to murder them in the first place: some things are always around no matter what, and you can generally expect the same things from them.

with weeds it's itchy eyes, nasty bugs and overgrowth. a marred flower bed, driveway or lawn. and the incessant attempts to be rid of them forever.

i've had a few weedy experiences (obviously with weeds themselves) and with --hate to say it -- weedy people and weedy organizations.

the kind that always find a way to bring something ugly to a beautiful situation. the kind that make a mess in everyone's life--(you can tell by the lives they are no longer allowed into). the kind that just give you the eebie jeebies cause you know there's something creepy hiding deep down. the kind that need very little fuel to prosper in their nastiness. the kind that really can't ever be anything else. because, even though they fool you with their sweet little flowers in the beginning, they will undoubtedly wreak havoc eventually, and never truly change.

but the good thing is, people generally see weeds for what they are. they don't drive past your otherwise lovely yard and scoff at the weeds. they just know weeds happen. that they show up out of nowhere and are a huge pain. that some people just have something nasty to say about everyone, that they cause destruction wherever they go. and people don't take them too seriously, because they have to deal with them too.

so here's to never being weedy.

and to avoiding the nasty things as much as possible.

The best of me

2010-08-16T14:10:00.001-07:00

Sundays aren't my favorite.because of all the down time and the 2-4 p.m. what-are-we-gonna-do-now moments.

because those moments always leave me way too wrapped up in my thoughts.

normally a good run shakes me right out of overthinking things, but on sundays my jogging shoes get a break too.

a little self-evalution isn't bad and it seems natural after perspective-refining conversations and lessons at church. but my poor brain just doesn't shut down sometimes. and all to often it gets the best of me.

thankfully i'm married to the most patient, consistent, supportive man i've ever met, and he listens to me ramble. he helps me make sense of what's realistic and what's not, points out the good things i'm thinking and the things that i could probably do without. and my dad's the same way. they really help me filter.

after a good long talk with either of them, i'm usually left with the truth--the lesson that i should keep, the thought that i can build on--and all the anxiety and guilt are washed away. thank heaven for people like that.

and what i came away with yesterday was the realization that i can (and so i should) answer this one tiny question: what gets the best of me?

doesn't it seem like there are so many good, better, great causes? tons of great things to be involved in, to try, to join, to help, to re-create, to change, to start? and there are so many people to be with, to visit, call, help, listen to, talk to, reconnect with, nurture and love?

usually in my effort to do a little of everything, no one person or thing gets my best, leaving me with scraps of unfinished ventures and scattered intentions. which makes me crazy anxious and completely down on myself - missing out on all those good things because i'm at the world's most pathetic pity party.

so i've decided to follow some good advice. to live more in the moment. to focus more on what's happening now, to give the best of me wholly to the things going on and the people right in front of me now. and especially not to let any other moment steal the best of me from this moment. then look back at the past knowing i was fully in each moment, each venture, with each person. that i soaked it all in gave it my best and that i'll do the same in the future.

that i gave the best of me.

Dear Blogger Voice, Come Back....

2010-05-07T07:26:00.000-07:00

I'm a phaser. That's pretty much all there is to it. I get into a really good groove, have one or two things on the brain and go like crazy. Then one day I wake up and remember how a month or so ago, I was way in to those one or two things, and it was so wonderful and life was grand, and I really loved it and I was being so consistent, etc. etc.--but now it's been one or two months since I even approached the thing(s).

Ugh.

Luckily, if it's something I really love, it nags at me until I get back into the groove.

So here I am, on one of the miraculous days my child actually sleeps past 7 a.m., when I should be curled up in bed sleeping in (and rejoicing), but the blog nags in my brain knocked me out from under the covers.

When I blog a lot, I start to think in blog. Everything I do is narrated by a little voice in my head in blog language. And I love that. It gives even simple little everyday things a little magic. Like I'm always watching one of my favorite movies, complete with narration.

I miss that little voice. And right now it's missing. So I'm forcing out this post, in the hopes that it will come back.

Dear little voice in my head,

Let's be friends again...it's been a while.

Front Porch Looking In...

2010-03-23T18:02:00.000-07:00

I came home from a photo session and saw this little cutie peaking through the window at me...She's way in to her glasses. And says "Woo Woo!" every time she puts them on. Silly.

Adi & Her Shadow

2010-03-03T17:52:00.000-08:00

This little girl loves her shadow. Seeing her in little moments like this remind me of how lucky I am to be home with her and watch her grow.

Whoever said you can't buy happiness...

2010-03-01T12:31:00.001-08:00

It's not Friday, but I'm in love. With this handsome little guy:

He just turned three. I know this because he's more like a human than a dog. Ask anyone that knows Hudson (yes people know him, he's got quite the little social life). He has no idea he's a dog, and neither do we, actually. So he has a birthday, and I know when it is.

Even when he wasn't three, he was really stinking cute:

Even a little cuter.

But I was in the process of potty training him then, which involved getting up every two hours (yes, just like with a baby) for potty breaks and teaching him to sleep in his kennel. Which may or may not have involved my sleeping on the floor with my fingers through the door.
So the tired/slightly annoyed that puppy pee is running my life feeling balance out the so SO cute factor.

But I swore (and persuaded Brent with the fact) that I'd never EVER have a dog that wasn't totally house-trained. So, I did what I had to do.
Now he's totally trained (and so our we) and the cute level is about equal. Granted the New Puppy Ah factor is long gone, but now this dog's got a place in our family and a much-bigger-than-life-as-a-dog personality.

Unless you've ever trained, lived with and loved a dog, this post probably will seem completely out there to you. But this little dog saved me.

We were in the process of learning and dealing with the fact that having children might not be an option for us. I was also running my photography business from home and it was going through a major crescendo, which was wonderful, but equated to lots of hours in an empty house in front of the computer.

Not good for my anxious OCD personality :)

So I decided a puppy was the answer. And begged and pleaded and tried to convince Brent of that too. He finally caved from an adamant no way never to whatever, but i don't love the idea.

I spent hours HOURS on the internet, in people's homes, etc. etc. trying to learn all about getting, raising and having a dog. I was determined to do it right if I was going to do it.

I bought and returned/re-sold three puppies. Not even joking. For some reason I'd get them home and have serious anxiety. I wish I would have written in my journal about it because now it seems so so silly to me. But for some reason at that time, it was a big deal, and really hard for me. It may have been the commitment factor. Who knows. All I know is that every time that happened, I got more and more determined not to let the Hyde side of me rule my life. So I continued to scour the web, KSL ads and forums.

Then I found this little guy. I'm pretty sure I was at the owners' house for two hours. She probably wanted to kick me out. I'm sure she hadn't had such a drilling interview as the one I gave her. I asked her about training, about her dogs, because she owned the mom and dad, about dogs and kids (in case it ever actually worked out), about leaving them, about biting...every question under the sun. No joke.

AND I was analyzing every tiny thing about the parent dogs and each little puppy, trying to decide which one I wanted. Some were feisty, some were female (which from my newly acquired depth of puppy knowledge I knew I did not want) and some were just plain lazy. Hudson (his name was Fudge then) was the laziest. Finally the owner told me there was probably nothing I could do to tick that dog off.

So I took him.

And called Brent with the "I bought a puppy" notice for the 4th time. He wasn't thrilled, but got everything set up.

And I didn't feel sick with anxiety like before. I just instantly fell in love with this little dog.

Say what you want, but he was a little blessing sent just to earth for me. I know it. I truly think it was something I had to do, and part of me believes I would have had a much harder time adjusting to parenthood in general, when that time finally came, if I hadn't had Hudsy. (Yeah, he has nicknames, too.)

Here are a few Hudon facts:

He's smart. Way WAY too smart. So he's been easy to teach and train.
He doesn't shed but shakes all the way to Emily's to be groomed
He knows when you need him to snuggle with ya.
He tolerates Adi. Barely.
He wants to be where we are.
He likes to play.
He thought he was one of our chickens. And refrained from eating them.
He's way too good for dog food. And can even get steak from my Grandpa Hess.
He barks at the Schwann man (I would too if I could.)
He has play dates with his doggy friends.
Brent spoils him way more than I ever have.
He's way over-the-top loyal. And doesn't hold a grudge.
If we're gone for five minutes, he greets us like it's been 5 years.
He'll walk with you anywhere, but running any distance over 1 mile is pushing it.
He walked home once from Brent's parents' because the fireworks freaked him out.
He naps with us. He thinks it's absolutely essential that he sleep right next to me.
We have to SPELL OUT things we don't want him to hear/know. Like Chris (my brother) and ride and treat and walk.
He comes running when he hears a string cheese package open.
And we love him, and he loves us. He's part of our little family.

Now I absolutely know this is true:

Photo Credit :PaperCrafts Magazine:

Mom's the World

2010-02-24T11:11:00.001-08:00

The world is not enough. Even if every person on the planet is either crammed into that Olympic arena or watching you on TV-- if your mom's not one of them, does it really matter who is?

I cried as Joannie Rochette opened her arms to present herself to the world and accept its applause before her performance. Because you know the one voice that wasn't cheering was the only one she wanted to hear--and that silence most likely weighed out all the other praise.

She lost her mom to a heart attack just two days before her short program. Her performance is moving. You can watch it here.

Moms really are so much of the magic we experience in life.

I heard a photographer speak at convention once who had recently had a friend photograph his family with their aged, ill mother. Nothing was posed or unnatural. His mother was blind so she kept her hands on their faces and her cheek close to theirs in order to communicate and "see" them. They are some of the most beautiful images I have ever seen. He described them as portraits of a family saying goodbye.

Soon after that day his mother passed away. On his flight to her funeral he looked out the window at the city lights below. He said he remembered thinking,"All of those people down there are going to wake up soon and go about their daily lives having no idea anything has changed, but the world will never be the same without my mother in it."

Mom's fuel life. So much of what I have tried and achieved has come about because my mom believed in me--and told me so. And I heard her telling others.

And when I have a new idea or thought or experience I call my mom. I usually know what she'll say, but somehow it's not the same if I don't hear it from her. And I truly believe she enjoys it as much as me. Natasha Gregson Wagner said, "I thought my mom's whole purpose was to be my mom. That's how she made me feel."

I love that, because it's exactly how I feel.

And I can't imagine giving the performance of a lifetime in any arena without knowing she was there, heart pounding, hands shaking, saying a little prayer for me. Crossing her fingers at all the hard spots and celebrating each tiny accomplishment.

I know it's been said so many times but I honeslty feel that while, to the world you may be one person, to one person you may be the world.

Especially if you happen to be a mom.

Lovesick & Letterpress

2010-02-17T16:29:00.000-08:00

Love makes me sick. I know because once, we had this awesome romantic, fairly-newly-wed anniversary weekend getaway in Jackson planned.

We got food poisoning instead.

Valentine's Day was going to be awesome this year because Brent had a 4 day weekend, and we so needed to at least drive somewhere where the sun was shining. Time to bust out of the cabin fever blahs and frolick in the sunbeams.

We got the flu instead.

Which has been followed by an official case of please-oh-please-be-spring-itis. I will most likely murder the groundhog if I ever meet him. Just so you know.

So I'm dreaming of my non-Idaho winter life where I own a letterpress, doodle and play with delicious papers & colors all the live long day. In the warm bright sun.

Hooray for Sycamore Street Press and this little bit of sunshine. Hoorah for letterpress and hand-printed lovelies.

Here are a few of my favorites:

Aaah. Refreshing, huh? And they're donating 100% of the profit from these cards to Haiti. Check out their shop (and buy me a card).

Mid-Winter Madness

2010-02-12T12:38:00.000-08:00

I may be having a mid-winter crisis...I'm pretty sure I'm having a mid-winter crisis. The most obvious evidence is all around me:

Chocolate wrappers
Lots of shopping receipts, obtained when "getting out of this house" was absolutely necessary
At least three extra pounds from trying every new recipe I can get my hands on (couldn't be from the chocolate)
Weird crafty cravings

The last one is the most serious. It's taking over my barely-coping brain.

I keep thinking of new projects. I see things and think "I could do that", " I could make that", "That would be easy"..... on and on and on--when really, none of that is true.

Just spend the 5 bucks Candis, save yourself the madness.

I realized it was a problem today when I asked Brent to make fortune cookies out of felt with me.

(Yikes)

He looked at me like I WAS a felt fortune cookie, kind of smiled and said, "ooookaaaay?"

That's when I knew I'd hit bottom.

Be spring already, dang it. I'm losin' it.

Day Book 1

2010-02-10T09:11:00.000-08:00

::A new little something fun. It's called The Simple Woman's Daybook. I heard about this from Cinderberry Stitches::

For Today...February 10, 2010

Outside my window...It's white and wintery.

I am thinking...It might be blissful to hibernate.

I am thankful for...creative thoughts and ideas.

I am loving...the long weekend ahead.

I am learning...that love and trust are different.

I am remembering...what the beginning of senior season is like.

I am going...book hunting in Border's

Daydreaming of...warm summer sun and white sandy beaches.

From the kitchen...the dishes are waiting patiently.

I am hoping...to give life to the ideas swirling aroud in my head.

I am wondering...what we should do for Brent's spring break.

Noticing...Hudson thinks crayons are delicious.

I am creating...winter photoshop brushes.

Hearing...Adi chanting "ah-oo-ah-ee-ah-oh-oh-oh" from Nemo.

I am reading...Daddy Long Legs by Jean Webster

Pondering these words..."Do what you can, with what you have, where you are." Theodore Roosevelt

Around the house...Are sweet little reminders that we live here.

One of my favorite things...the idea that chocolate is a requirement for Valentine's Day.

A few plans for the rest of the week...play in Photoshop, doodle, save the world.

From my picture journal...

Pigtails

2010-02-04T12:23:00.000-08:00

I giggled while I did this...

...something about playing dress up with my own live little baby doll.

I've been secretly planning ways to do it. And today I shamelessly trapped her in the high chair with a Baby Einstein video. All that stuff on her tray? Toys and snacks.

WhaHaHaha.

She was not impressed:
And kept looking around me and the camera to actually watch the bribery video.

But I feel like I've joined the "mommies who at least attempt to do their little girls' hair" club.

Which is a big deal, if you're a mommy.

Not so much if you're the little girl, apparently.

German Chocolate Cookies

2010-02-02T15:41:00.001-08:00

Never underestimate a skinny cookie.

Its thin little profile and 1-inch radius can only mean one thing:
that a single bite contains your weekly quota of calories.

But the bliss you experience during that single bite?

Oh my.

It's dumb that skinny cookies don't make skinny people. I've been craving a German Chocolate Cake-like cookie. And since there's really nothing you can't do with a cake mix, I thought I'd see what I could come up with. Which means I had to experiment and taste test...

...Which means I'll be fasting for a month while living on the elliptical.

Try them out. I hope you love them. And don't call me if you're clothes shrink.

::You can right click,copy & save this or download it here.::

Adi

2010-02-01T21:51:00.001-08:00

Shopping List Download

2010-02-01T13:23:00.001-08:00

It's Monday.

Ick.

I made you a little something to sweeten it up--a shopping list to get you going.

Download it here

Mmmonday. Enjoy!

One Little Thing

2010-01-28T12:30:00.000-08:00

After a hand-cramping catch-up journal entry (that took more than an hour and is barely legible) I decided there had to be another way of:

documenting life
recording things I want to remember
keeping notes of moments that mean something to me
not being completely intimidated by keeping a journal

And all my blog strolling paid off. Because a bunch of ideas I saw somewhere in blogdom slammed together in my head and became this one little thing, which I decided was safe to get excited about and have a late-craft-night hangover from.

It's my "one little thing" can. I saw the idea for re-using formula cans here, and the idea for writing little love notes for and about your children everywhere.

I want to fill this one with notes about my sweet Adi. She does things all the time that I adore. And I don't want to wind up ten years from now, looking back on this time in her life and remember there were so many "things" I loved about it, but not remember what they were.

Plus, Brent and I have this agreement that when I'm old and losing my mind, he'll come read my journals and little notes to me.

So now, instead of blocking out entire weekends of my life to record and catch up on every tiny detail, I can just write down one little thing, and plop it in the can.

Who said formula cans, scrapbook paper and modge podge couldn't save the world?

Wednesday's Wonder: Half.Com

2010-01-20T09:07:00.000-08:00

Let me apologize in advance for any bruises you get from this post. Because you're gonna kick yourself for paying full price for books, movies and games.

Half. com is this Wednesday's Wonder. (Please pretend like last Wednesday's was not just two posts ago)

Oh, how I love this website. Our friend told us about it in college. From then on we bought and sold our textbooks there and saved ourselves a ton of money. Probably even enough to splurge on the McDonald's Dollar menu--which was a big deal.

Now I buy Adi's books & movies there as well. And really I can only stand to watch the same movie or read the same book with Adi 5000 times. So it's helpful. Plus I have this weak spot in my heart for Disney movies...and have somehow convinced myself that we need them. All. Eventually.

And I've recently become ADDICTED to reading. My friend Jessica has a Wednesday's Read on her blog. I haven't been disappointed yet with a single book she's suggested. It's like having my own little literary researcher. I love it! But I don't always love to go to the library. Sometimes I can read a book in two days, sometimes it takes me way longer, so I like to just buy a copy. Plus, most of the books she suggests are keepers and I'd like to read them again and again. Whala! Half.com.

I've bought books and movies for under $3 and the shipping is usually only an extra $2 or so. Way way way cheaper than full price. And you don't have to bid like on Ebay. Just find the item you want, in the condition you want and checkout--with PayPal by the way, so it's totally safe.

Try it out. Let me know what you find!

Fontarific

2010-01-14T18:43:00.000-08:00

I'm slightly addicted to fonts. They're one of my favorite things to collect and play with. These ones are absolutely free!

Check out this fabulous site!

Ziploc-This Wednesday's Wonder

2010-01-13T20:16:00.000-08:00

I'll probably be buried in Ziploc. It's really the best option if you think about it. Ziploc's slogan is "Keep stuff fresh and secure".

Which describes my post-mortal requests to the T.

There's something magical about the stuff. Put something that would normally be old and nasty tomorrow in a ziploc and TADA! It's good for like the next thousand years.

Some things even seem to come out of the bag way better than they went in. Take cookies for example. Store those babies in Ziploc and you've got soft cookies for a month. Plus, it's relatively cheap.

So with any luck I'll come out of that bag looking like Megan Fox, and my family will be $5,996 ahead.

And it's only fitting, seeing that just about every other possible thing in my house is stored in gallon ziploc bags. Whoever digs up my remains and artifacts in 3057 will probably think I owned stock in the stuff.

Ziploc is definitely a modern wonder - the gallon size is my personal favorite.

Currently I adore them for corralling itty bitty felt cut-outs (for Adi's someday quiet book), keeping diapers out of sight and smell when I'm in the car and far from a garbage can, and storing glittery Christmas ornaments. But they've got countless endearing uses. Countless.

If you (for some insane reason that completely escapes me) can't think of uses for them, Ziploc made a nifty little interactive chart on their website to help you out. There's even "Incredible Ziploc Stories" tab. Storage bag gone superhero.

Check out lists of handy dandy uses from these doting fans:
M0rning Star (about halfway down their list)
Make Ice Cream In A Baggie
The Happiness Project
DiY Life
Associated Content

AND there are coupons here

What are your favorite ways to use ziploc? I'd love to hear them.

P.S. I also accept gallon ziplocs as gifts

2010-01-09T19:31:00.000-08:00

I'm pretty sure my glasses are dating my keys. There's really no other logical explanation for why they always seem to be missing. Always. At the same time.

And I usually NEED them. Like tonight. I need my glasses. Otherwise the world's a blur, and putting my contacts back in after a 9 p.m. shower is silly. It's like asking to accidentally fall asleep on the couch with them in.

I'm slightly more desperate to find my keys when they're missing. Ask anyone. I tend to be a little late.

A lot.

Usually because I can't find my keys.

My parents even bought me one of these for Christmas:You put it on your keychain, whistle when you can't find them, and it whistles back. Problem is, it whistles at every slighty-shrill noise. So I turned it off and removed it...and don't know where it is.

Doesn't matter though; you can't fight true love. And there's really no other way to explain this dilemma besides the fact that my keys and my glasses run away together--often.

Seriously.

Because we've established homes for these things.

My ~~slightly OCD~~ very organized husband puts them here:

{The drawer in the kitchen} {My drawer of stuff in the bathroom}

But we have a mutual understanding that I generally toss them in one of these places:{my desk} {my nightstand}
{the table on the way out the door} {my pencil/marker/scissor holders}

*Notice they're missing in each of these pictures.*

HOWEVER.

As I was walking around taking these little evidence pictures, brent asked what I was doing.

Then pointed this out:

Tuh.

I mumbled something about how they sneaked in the back door.

I hate it when he's right.

But he did just tell me he was going to bed and would sleep on my side so it was warm when I got there.

Fine. Be helpful and sweet.

But I'm checking the drawers before I go to bed.

My New List

2010-01-08T11:42:00.001-08:00

Brent will most likely murder me for writing this post. So if I disappear, you'll know why.

In fact, I told him I just needed 30 minutes to myself. He took Adi for a little drive so I could have some time...and blog about him (obviously he didn't know the details).

Today is the last day of his very fantastically long holiday break from school. I'm pretty sure we just spent something like 30 days straight hanging out together. Aaaah. Thank you, world, for celebrating the holidays.

And spending time like we don't usually get to, we've been able to relax and just enjoy being together.

The thought occurred to me the other day that if I had the chance to re-write that silly list of things some teacher inevitably makes everyone write about the qualities of their future spouse, I know exactly what I'd write. I'd sign, seal, and deliver it to my 15 year-old self today.

Along with a little note to go ahead and date the other guys, but not to waste too much time, effort or heartache on them, because, at this point, my 15-year old self had already met the man of her dreams.

And here are just a few of the (million) things I would highlight.

Anyone who knows Brent (and me) knows that he is one of the most chill, patient people on the planet. He's not lazy by any means, but he doesn't get all worked up over silly things. He takes time to think, he's rational and objective. I love that. Because I'm not, let's be real.

I never really thought that the sound of the vacuum or dishes being washed would replace my "must sing like Frank Sinatra and play the guitar like Tom Petty" requirement. But it officially has. The man just helps out. I don't have to ask him. He just does it. Makes me feel good. Like my entire purpose as his wife is not to clean his house. We do stuff together. I love that.

And while we're on the topic, he can sing. And he does. To Adi. All the time. It's really one of the sweetest things ever. He sings to her to play with her, to distract her from a major tantrum, and to get her to sleep. She requests songs from him at bedtime. In fact she requests "dad" to rock her to sleep most of the time.

He saves me. Every day, really. From myself, imaginary expectations I place on myself and from this crazy world. He's never told me a thought I have is stupid, that the things I'm thinking are crazy or that an idea is too big. He's truly sincerely supportive. He'll talk about anything with me like it's the most important thing on the planet at that moment. And sometimes it is to me.

He's my friend. We watch movies, giggle at Adi, play, pray and work together. We read, budget, cook, crash diet, and crash our diets together. If something happens during the day, he's the one I want to tell. He's the one I can hang out with in my sweats and ponytail, or dress up and pretend to be a responsible adult.

And we have big plans. Big plans for our kids, our house, our future. And even though some haven't worked out, or some may exceed our wildest expectations, I'm glad to know they're our plans. Our future. I love that.

And now I think I'll go hug him. And finish the list another time...

Wednesday's Wonders

2010-01-06T13:07:00.000-08:00

There are a few thousand reasons I could not have been a pioneer. Literally. Thousands.

And each time I learn about something new, that statement is confirmed. I just love having little conveniences, little clever do0-dads, and just plain smart stuff that makes life delicious.

Plus, it's Wednesday. Hump day. Middle-of-the-week-I-may-never-live-til-Friday day. I think it's appropriate to add a little sunshine on such a volatile weekly event. And so i'll share. In no particular order. Every Wednesday.

Number one: Laundry.

I barely survive as a non-pioneer doing laundry. I seriously can't imagine hauling it all to the stream when it's no doubt about a thousand times smellier than anything I wash now. And scrubbing. A lot. Knowing it's gotta get clean and last forever, or I've gotta get out my needle and thread -which is a whole different story.

So, in celebration of modern laundry here is something wonderful I'm currently in love with.I can hear the gasps of Tide purists already. I happen to be one of them. BUT I'm a sucker for smells. So after hearing about this fabulous-smelling soap, I had to give it a try. And in order to console myself, I checked to see who made it. Proctor & Gamble. The Tide people. Instant justification.

It's yummy all on it's own, but coupled with the secret ingredient I'm about to reveal (Tyra Banks' voice just flashed through my head) it's divine.I am not even kidding when I tell you I sniff my clothes at least three times a day. And my laundry room is just a delightful little place I'm now happy to visit.

So give it a try. You'll love it, I'm sure.

Seasons Change

2010-01-05T11:51:00.000-08:00

The weather outside is frightful. Well, it really must be if they're writing songs about it, right? The people in my house have a totally different opinion however. This is how Hudson felt about it:Nobody will ever be able to convince me he isn't smiling from ear to ear. Pretty sure this very snowy day last week is the highlight of the winter for him. He even found it in his heart to explore with Adi. We've reached a new level, my friends. I don't love the cold, but if it brings Adi and Hudsy to some kind of an agreement, I hope the snow stays forever. I'm pretty sure he's the one that taught Adi this little trick:She was thrilled that the stuff was also edible. Really what more can a girl ask for than fun that requires new clothes, is soft and comfy if you "crash" (as adi would say) and doubles as a tasty little snack? It might just be heaven. And, most of her favorite people showed up just to see her stinking cute snow clothes (thank you Kohls bottomless discounts) and to watch her giggle as the stuff just kept falling from the sky. As my dad watched her playing, he turned to me and said, "This is what it's all about, all the other stuff really doesn't matter..." He's so right. I love it when he comes out with those perspective-refreshing one liners. And that's the reason for this post. Because that, combine with these next two pictures totally confirmed a thought I had during a mind-clearing walk the other day -

Seasons change. There's a time for everything. I love these pictures for lots reasons, but here's why they struck me:

1-My sweet Adi, of course. The little bundle of joy that has brought a new season to my life. AND

2-The leaves. Those fall leaves are still hanging on. They're pretty now. They were beautiful in the fall--in their season.

It helped bring a lot of things together for me. My life before Adi, when I was involved so much in what I was doing, in what I wanted and felt I needed to do was beautiful then. It was the season for that. Those things are okay now, but they're losing they're luster. Frankly they're out of season; it's time to make a few changes.

Because someday, really not too far away, the leaves will change and the snow will fall onto that very sidewalk, and my Adi will not be toddling down it in her tiny snow clothes. She'll be in a path all her own. Now is my season to enjoy this little sweety...and to giggle while the snowflakes keep falling.

Ugh...slacking!

2009-12-28T17:32:00.000-08:00

I realize I don't have to restate the fact that I'm one big slacker when it comes to blogging. But, I feel better saying it then moving on. So there you go. I'm a slacker. Consider me purged.

So my darling little idea of sharing 25 of my thousands of favorite things about Adi as a countdown to Christmas slipped into holiday-picture-madness oblivion. Most things do in November and December, actually. But this little missy comes up with new cute things everyday and I so don't want to forget them. I made a quick list one photoshop-ridden night so I would remember what to share. And in order to not make myself crazy with a checklist right after my largest checklist season of the year, I'll just share a little at a time.

Her newest favorite thing? SNOW! These pics are of the first night it snowed decent flakes. It was late but I had to take her out to see it! It was absolutely worth our own personal Christmas Story clothing scene to see how amazed she was by it!

I'm always overwhelmed by a sense of gratitude when this little girl sees something new and thinks it's the coolest thing ever. I should be so much more amazed and grateful for the constant miracles and blessings around me.

The Little Things

2009-12-04T17:44:00.000-08:00

I love the Christmas season. Every tiny little thing about it. The smells, the lights, the anticipation, all of it. Even the crowds at the stores and the fact that it creeps up sooner and sooner each year. I love that the whole world makes such a big deal (whether they know it or not) over the birth of the Savior, and that even the hardest heart feels the love and peace in the air.

I especially love how each year, without fail, I always have little tugs at my heart reminding me of what things really are important, and which things I could probably do without. I love that time stands still on Christmas Day, it just seems like a little niche out of time filled with love and perspective. I always try to pause each Christmas and just drink in the moment and take a mental and emotional picture, because I seem to forget the little details of each Christmas so quickly. I rarely remember what gifts I received or gave in previous years, and I'm always surprised by some decoration I forgot I purchased when I open the rubbermaid each year. I never forget the feeling of Christmas though. I always remember it with a smile, and the whole year through I get little glimpses of Christmas joy.

It's the same with Adi. She is changing all the time and I forget the little things she does way too soon. The first few months we had her home are a blur of sleepless nights and colic but I look back on them with that same smile--knowing the moments were sweet and filled with overwhelming love. And this little blessing toddling around my house is changing every moment. I love that I'm best buds with a 16 month old little girl. She does so many things each day that I wish I could take mental pictures of to go back and peek at in the future. This is one thing that's been on my mind especially.

So, I thought I'd combine the two and write something I love about my Adi for each day until Christmas. I love the countdown excitement, and I figure this will give me a chance to accomplish two things at once. Since it's the 4th, I'll double up one of these days:)

First of all, this girl's got her favorite things. Cute picture (taken by my fabulous sister in law), but if you look really close, you'll see one of them. She's got a toothbrush in her hand. I finally stuffed it down her sleeve so she could hold it and cooperate. She LOVES toothbrushes, any toothbrush and she hauls them (yeah, she's got several) all over the house. She calls them "teeth" and giggles any time we actually brush them. Fun.

2009-11-13T17:59:00.000-08:00

Little Scarecrow

2009-11-13T17:51:00.000-08:00

No one tells you that Halloween is a joke if your child is under the age of 4...Whoa. Adi had sloppy nose paint, no hat and crazy crazy crazy scarecrow hair. She was pretty ticked until she realized is was all for a trip to see the grandmas.

Watch It Chick

2009-06-26T19:10:00.001-07:00

Meet Stella...

I am absolutely NOT exaggerating when I tell you she is in love LOVE with this man:

who, as you can plainly see in this picture, belongs to me.

ME.

However, this chicken runs when Brent calls her name, lets him pet her and makes sounds I didn't know could come from a bird when he walks into our backyard.

Ridiculous.

Yesterday Adi and I were playing in the backyard waiting for him to get home and the chickens were just wandering around eating bugs, grass, whatever chickens do. Then Brent came home and sat by us out in the yard. Thirty seconds later this chick was laying in the grass next to my husband.

I tell him it's because he's the only man in her life besides Hudson, and he doesn't really count because he would secretly like us to roast her for dinner. I feed the things, give them water, clean out their coop, make sure they have a warm light to sleep under, and dig up and hand-feed them LIVE worms (yuck) and. Brent walks out, rounds them up a few times, talks sweet to them, and Stella falls for him.

Stupid chicken.

These are the other ones I currently don't have an issue with:

This is Peep. We call her that because that's what she does. All day. Peeps. I'm pretty sure this is what people are talking about when they call someone a chicken. She's pretty jumpy and really prefers to be just like this, nestled in the straw.

Roxy. Because she kinda looks like an 80's rock star.

Thelma and Louise. These girlies eat, sleep, peck and would probably road trip and scheme together if they could.
Brent probably deserves their affection a little more than I give him credit for. He takes care of them at night when I can't wake up from my lack-of-sleep-induced coma to take care of them. He's chased them around the yard more than once because I couldn't get them back in their little house. He has scooped his share of poop. And he's building them a pretty cute little coop. He really is amazing. He's just building it in his spare time with NO plans, and he wants it to look great and be just right.

AND really, what man would agree to let his wife have chickens AND help her with them just because she's always wanted them? That's love people. I'm spoiled ROTTEN.

Stella's just jealous.

Music to sweat to

2009-06-03T18:46:00.000-07:00

So, I normally really really hate the gay Utah morning shows. BUT, thanks to laundry folding I was stuck on that channel one day and just left it. This crazy fitness lady was on talking about the beats per minute in songs and how many you need to get a good work out. She suggested this yesfitness.com website. But on that website you have to buy the whole dumb disc and who wants to waste anymore money on "I'll buy this and lose weight" stuff? SO go into your itunes account and in the store's search engine type 132 bpm. Wah-lah. A ton of single songs to download and walk/run/elliptical to. Hooray for ipods.

Blacker

2009-04-25T07:52:00.000-07:00

Is that what you call a blog slacker? I have no idea, but that's what I've become lately! Life with an 8 month old is so fun and busy, and it's senior season which means pure madness. It's been fun, just real busy. I've had some of the best seniors this year though. They've had the cutest outfits and been so fun to work with! I'll post a few of my favorite pics on the photoblog.

I am so excited for the sunshine. I seriously canNOT believe how long the gray gray days of winter lasted this year...whoa! Too much for me. I'm pretty sure Brent's gonna have to move me somewhere beautiful and 80 degrees year-round soon.

Brent's out mowing the lawn, and seriously, it's music to my ears. He even smells like gasoline and fresh cut grass, which to me is blissful right now. I'm so excited to be outside this summer with Adi. This girl loves to wiggle her toes in the grass. I think she'd sit outside for hours and roll around if I'd let her. Her little arms and cheeks already have a little tan.

Next week I'm gonna start planting flowers and getting ready for my square foot gardens. I'm so excited about that! All this mommy stuff has had a serious nesting effect on me and I'm way into everything homemade. My newest addictions are homemade bread and pizza. I'm gonna have to plant a ton of tomatoes and herbs to keep up with it! I'm really looking forward to it. In fact, I find myself more excited to get out my mixer and my sewing machine than my camera, and that's a huge deal for me.

When we couldn't have kids for so long it was a really hard adjustment for me to throw my heart and soul into something besides a family because in my head that's what I'd always pictured. Pretty soon I fell in love with photography and adjusted to it all. It has been such a huge blessing in my life. I've never been a nine-to-fiver and I have to always be creating something! Six years later this little girl made a debut, and it's taken some time, but I've been able to re-prioritize in my head and my heart. I will always love photography and it will always be something I will do, but it feels so good to be a mom and to love it!

My next task? To talk Brent into chickens. My uncles Josh's amazing wife Tiff (I'm serious, she is one amazing person) has been nice enough to give me some advice and let me peek at her chicken coop. I've always always always wanted chickens and we'll see if I can't get Brent to cave. I don't want a farm...just a few little peepers for some nice yummy fresh eggs. Hmm. I'll keep you posted.

I'll post some pics of my sweet Adi soon. She rolling all over the place, clapping her hands, clicking her tongue, shaking her head, trying to crawl...you name it, this girl wants to try it!

Kay, there's my catch-up. Gosh, I should sit down and just type more often. Apparently rambling isn't a problem for me :)

TADA

2009-04-02T11:38:00.000-07:00

I finally finally got my new website working. www.candisschow.com It's not full of gallery pics yet, but it's functioning! Hooray! Check it out and let me know if you have some favorites you've seen I should put on there. It's hard to think through 4 years of pics....

Whoa....Tired

2009-03-23T07:43:00.001-07:00

So, just like I never paid full attention to a mom when she was ranting about colic (which I have since learned is NOT fun) I also never really sympathized over teething or colds.

DUMB

I totally should have listened. This little girly has got both, probably caused by eachother, but holy cow! Last night marks the third, THIRD night of up every hour. Yep, you heard me, every 60 minutes. Which adds up to about...oh...not much sleep. Poor little thing just cries and coughs and chews on her fingers. She's usually pretty stuffy too which makes it hard to drink a bottle. So out comes her nemisis, the suction bulb. So then not only is she feeling awful, she's also angry. It hasn't been fun.

Hopefully these little joys pass soon. We're all getting a little tired.

Merry Christmas

2008-12-22T11:34:00.000-08:00

For Grandma & Grandpa Hess

2008-11-26T09:23:00.000-08:00

This little video is for Grandma & Grandpa Hess. It took me a sec to get the camera situated, every time she sees it she's mesmerized by it and she stops talking. I finally got it situated so she didn't know it was there and would talk to me. Love you guys!

Smarty Pants

2008-11-24T16:36:00.001-08:00

She's got us completely figured out. It's ridiculous really. The girl's SCREAMS (I'm talking SCREAMS)come to a screeching hault when we pick her up. It's so funny. She knows exactly how she wants to be held, fed, rocked, etc. She can somehow miraculously tell the difference between her bed and any other soft surface in the house and she really prefers not to be in any kind of a wet/messy diaper for more than about 4 seconds. Her new thing is to gag if she's done eating and you try to even put the bottle in her mouth. If she's not ready to be burped and you try...yikes. She loves to bath, and she knows when we're getting her ready for it. She loves being naked and doesn't mind having clothes on but hates being dressed/undressed. She smiles at everything and copies our facial expressions and tries to mimic our sounds. She'd rather not fall asleep--the crying is the worst right before she goes out. AND, she knows she wants ME to hold her. Not really anyone else. She's fine if I'm not in the room when someone else has her, but if she sees or hears me, she turns on the waterworks (fake, by the way, because there really isn't any water involved at all). I secretly love it. The other day Brent had her and he brought her into the bedroom where he was letting me nap (he's perfect, I tell you) and when I started to talk to her she REACHED for me. It seriously made my whole day. I love that little girl.

This is her little Old Navy dress I couldn't wait to put her in and it finally fits. She's just hanging out on the couch. Pretty cute, huh?

Don't mess with naptime.

2008-11-18T08:00:00.000-08:00

I don't know when they started this little trend, but the elementary school kids stroll around the block around 8:30 each morning. Seriously? How many more time-wasters can they think of? P.E., Recess and a morning walk. Hmm.

I really don't think I would care THAT much, but 8:30 happens to be when little miss Adilyn lays back down for a morning nap, since she wakes up at 5 a.m. smiling and giggling. And the kids are loud---LOUD. I understand a little chit chat, a little laughing, whatever. But the screaming, the singing at the top of their lungs--for real? Save it for music time.

PLUS Hudson likes to sit on the ottoman and stare out the window. And since everything else in his little life has changed, I'm not going to take away his one last sense of normalcy by closing the curtains so the kids won't harrass him.

All of this results in a screaming baby, a barking dog and a CRAZY me.

Don't they know naptime is sacred? Especially when the poor thing is learning to fall asleep on her own, and waking up means at least 20 more minutes of screaming and coaxing. Seriously. Plus, Adi-less moments are rare and jam packed with a two minute shower, lighting-fast computer work and anything else that requires two hands.

Walk in the gym, walk around the football field, don't walk at ALL--read a book or something, but don't drag the kids past my house at 8:30 a.m. She's napping =)

3 Months

2008-11-07T21:39:00.000-08:00

My child is going to hate me by the time she can actually say "cheese". This is how I know:Yeah, she was not impressed with our efforts to document her three month mark. That one was actually taken toward the end of the session, so I can't blame her. We did get some cute ones, though. Here are some of my favorites: I'll get a bunch fixed up and make a slideshow or something.

I'm telling you, I have a new-found sympathy for moms who bring their babies to photo sessions. I have the studio in my stinking house for crying out loud and I still had to schedule her entire day around pictures. She had two baths--one to get ready, and one to calm her down once we got done. I hate to admit it, but I did take 4 outfits downstairs because I couldn't decide which one to put her in. Her schedule was completely messed up. She had half a nap, half a bottle and went to bed early. Yikes. I think I'll hug every mom that comes from now on!

Adi is so fun right now! I love this age. She smiles and coos and interacts so much more. She'll copy us when we stick our tongues out at her, and she's trying so hard to figure out how we blow raspberries. When I tell her stories or sing songs she'll copy my eye expressions and sometimes make a sing songy sound in the same pitch as my voice. I can't believe how smart babies are and how fast they learn. It really is amazing. Her newest favorite thing is when we hold her up in the bathtub and let her float. She LOVES it. Those chubby little legs can kick! She's so fun. I'm so thankful we get to experience this. We love her so much!

Ultra concentrated joy.

2008-11-05T10:29:00.000-08:00

I saw this on the counter this morning and it made me smile.

Ordinary Miracles

2008-11-03T12:56:00.000-08:00

When I look at Adilyn I'm amazed to think she's here, healthy and strong and ours forever. We prayed and cried and hoped she'd come someday. We worried and hoped and prayed through the pregnancy, and did the same while she was in the hospital. We celebrated every one of her victories--staying alive her first couple of days, breathing well with machines, breathing only room air, staying warm on her own, learning to eat on her own; gaining a handful of ounces and even filling diapers. I cried when she'd have a bad day or fell back a little. I was amazed as I watched her adjust to life--starting to make sounds, recognizing our voices, opening her eyes, and even seeing her little eyelashes and toenails grow in.

Now she's twelve weeks old and doing so well--just like a normal baby--an ordinary baby...and it got me thinking how wonderful ordinary miracles really are. This week she learned to copy our gestures, follow us with her eyes, and she figured out exactly how she likes to be held -- it's opposite of how we hold her when she falls asleep :)I just marvel at her. She is just a miracle. I am so thankful that I have been given this blessing in my life.

Adi's middle name is Grace, and it's because everything about her has happened through the grace of our Heavenly Father. I want her to always know that. I felt it so strong when we were in the hospital especially. I know He was there with us and with her, and that He was so aware of us. We felt so much comfort through the entire thing, especially the hardest moments. I know it was because of Him. Even our little Hudson handled things better than we expected. I learned so much about faith and patience and love just from waiting for Adi, and only beginning the adoption process, then following sweet promptings that led us to finally getting her here, at just the right time to keep us both safe.

Something else happened today that reaffirmed my faith in His involvement in our lives. Four weeks before Adi was born, Brent's hours at work were cut in half because of some ISU budget cuts. So the last little while has been interesting financially. And hard. I knew there had to be a purpose for it, though, and that it didn't just happen by chance--especially because of the timing--when we finally had Adi, and when the bills and expenses were going to be astronomical. Brent and I have discussed it a lot. We haven't understood it, we've just felt like it would be okay (not having any idea HOW)and that it would eventually make sense.

Since then we've had more blessings than I can list. I had a couple of weddings scheduled for August--seemingly bad timing. Brent & Brian even shot one of them because it was the weekend I had Adi. But the extra money actually couldn't have come at a better time. We had help from family with food, gas and lodging while we were in Logan. I've had people who have owed me money forever calling and asking if they could pay me. I've had overdue invoices I was able to collect. I prayed and prayed that I would be able to start pictures again when I could handle it because I knew the money would help, but I refuse to put work before Adi. I'd rather eat ramen and park the car for six months. Slowly I've felt ready to work again, and the work has come, with little or no advertising on my part, and Brent's been home to watch Adi when I've been working. He's also been able to find extra work in the most random circumstances.

Last week our bill was significantly reduced through assistance through the hospital--because of Brent's hour cutback. This morning we found out he gets to go full time again. I paid my tithing yesterday, and we've been paying it all along. You can't convince me it's a coincidence. None of this is. We've been able to spend most of two extra days a week together--the three of us, during Adi's first few months, we've learned a lot about a lot of things and we've grown.

It all may sound like no big deal, like just ordinary coincidences, but we know we've been blessed with miracles.

Frightfully Cute!

2008-11-01T23:55:00.000-07:00

Afternoon Showing

2008-10-28T17:30:00.000-07:00

I usually only see this sweet smile at 5 in the morning or right after a feeding or nap during Adi's 15-20 minutes of play time.

THEN I found this little number someone had given us as part of a gift.

Apparently the poor little thing hasn't been coming out with those more often because she's had some colic. These are homeopathic and completely natural, so I figured they were worth a shot. Okay, they are ABSOLUTELY worth it. After a few of these Adi smiled and kicked and played at 4 in the afternoon like it was 5 in the morning and she'd just woken up from a long nap!

Hooray for colic tablets.

YOU'RE the mom...

2008-10-14T09:07:00.000-07:00

In our attempt to keep this sweet little person alive and happy, Brent and I ask each other questions about Adi ALL the time,especially when she's crying (as if one of us knows the answer). Most often it starts with, "Do you think she's..."

Yeah, and for a while we both would throw an idea out there in an attempt to sound like we knew what we were doing--like, "Maybe her tummy hurts, maybe she's cold, maybe she thinks is 3 p.m., not 3 a.m., maybe she wants her binky, maybe she doesn't want her binky, maybe she wants the other binky" --you get the idea. The suggestions were endless.

One morning (EARLY), Brent was rocking her and asked me some "Do you think she's..." question. I turned around and stated what we both knew was obvious. "I really don't know, dear!" Then I asked the million dollar question, "Why do you keep asking me all this stuff that I don't know the answer to?"

And he replied with the statement I've been mulling over ever since. "Because you're the mom, you're supposed to know this stuff."

(I'll pause while you picture the horror that spread across my face).

Now, I realize that this wasn't an entirely original idea. When you're five and play with dolls, you act like the mom and naturally take care of the baby as if you know when it's time for it to eat, sleep, etc. because you're the "mom" and you know everything. The DOLL isn't alive and screaming however.

Even when you decide to try to have kids It's usually money, timing, etc. that dominate the conversation--as if knowing what to do with the thing isn't even an issue.

(As I'm writing this, suddenly the bossy overhelpful NICU nurses don't seem so annoying.)

Anyway...

I picked Adi up out of her crib this morning after a failed attempt to let her fall asleep on her own ended in tears--hysterics really. As soon as I wrapped my arms around her the waterworks ceased. We sat in the chair, and as I held her and talked, her sweet little blue eyes stared right into mine. Her little body relaxed and she calmed down completely.

And then it hit me - in a totally different way. I'm IT for this girl, at least for now. I'm the one that makes everything better, I'm the one that can do no wrong. I'm the one with encouraging words, sweet lullabyes and healing hugs. (I'm not oblivious to the fact that she also knows I'll feed her). In her little life I'll be the example of what a mom, a woman, and a friend should be. It's daunting.

I'm just so grateful I have the mom I do. Sometimes I get on her case for not having all the answers and not giving the advice I want to hear. It's really ridiculous because she always knows what I acutally need, usually before I do. And most of the time it's just for her to wrap her arms around me and talk to me. When I was young, I thought my mom's whole purpose was to be my mom. That's really how she made me feel.

I just hope I can be that for Adi and someday feel like I'm on my way to being the kind of mom my mom has been for me when Brent looks at me and says, "You're the mom."

I was here first...

2008-10-09T22:15:00.000-07:00

"I was here first." That's what Hudson would say if he could tell you about Adilyn's arrival. "I was here first and she ruined my life." Poor thing. Life as he knew it (as our baby) has changed.

And the winner is...

2008-10-06T22:32:00.000-07:00

Seriously, there are a few things you can't live without when you have a newborn. If I were in charge of the Nobel Peace Prize, the inventors of these things would win hands down and here's why:

Infant Tylenol: Adi had shots today--enough said.

The Boppy Pillow: I'm pretty sure the three of us have ALL had a turn sleeping on this thing. At two in morning it keeps your head from the sunday-school-bob. It saves your arms and hands from total pain and numbness while bottle feeding. AND I can surf the net or update my blog while nursing Adi at 3 a.m. Pretty handy.

Soothie Binkies: Not cute--don't care. It's the perfect shape, she doesn't choke or gag on it, and it's big enough for her to latch on to. There's even a handy dandy handle thingy on the outside that I always end up sticking in my mouth when my hands are full. Plus they smell like vanilla.

The Baby Wrap: This one's from Wrap n' Wear. They look kind of silly, but they hypnotize your baby, I swear. Adi ended up with a cold a couple weeks ago and REALLY wanted to be held. As soon as I'd put her in it she'd fall (and stay) asleep. Plus I could get stuff done. I'm thinking I'll realize it's true value when I have more kids.

The Hammock Tub: The thing has saved our lives. Adi loves her bath. It's the one fail-proof procedure we have for calming her down. This tub has a hammock thingy she can just lay and relax in. Sometimes she even sleeps through her bath. No more slippery-baby juggling.

Quick-Steam Bags: Saves me from boiling bottles, binkies and pump parts. I LOVE these.

Lansinoh Lanolin: Sweet relief my friends, sweet relief.

Pampers Diapers: I'm thinking these embody the difference between boxers and briefs. They're thinner, smaller, and stay closer to the body. They actually fit. The fancy yellow stripe turns blue when it's time for a change. Genius.

Carter's Burp Cloths: They're cute and I love the material. They totally coordinate with the carter's clothes, too. Darling!

Baby Mine Receiving Blankets: Perfect for swaddling. I love them as an around-the-house blanket. Not too warm. Just right. You can't have enough!

So there. I love this stuff. I'm sure I'll think of more. But I love these. Thank you smart people of the world for making my life as a new mom easier! If you have favorites, please comment and let me know!

Around The Clock...

2008-09-30T12:28:00.000-07:00

I knew I'd be writing this eventually, dang it. Pretty sure the thought came to me around 10 a.m. right after I'd woken up (yes, for the first time that day) sometime in July. Or it could have been right after the nap that began at 1 p.m. Ridiculous, but sleeping through pregnancy is actually a pretty good way to deal when nothing fits, you're swollen like the Michelin Man, are steaming hot and have zero motivation...for anything. Plus, let's be realistic--even if you're not doing anything while you're pregnant, you're clearly super-human; growing a baby is hard work. Anyway, as I was waking up I was telling myself to enjoy being in charge of my own life while it lasted--sleeping in and naps included. You know your entire life is about to change because you've seen it happen to other people, but you can't quite imagine it happening to you. Heck you couldn't even imagine morning sickness, big bellies or heartburn (all of which absolutely occur). Fast forward to August 7th. That's the day my life began to revolve around 1, 4, 7 and 10. That's when we would visit the NICU to help take care of Miss Adilyn. Every three hours, around the clock. No matter what. Change her diaper, take her temperature and help feed her--or at least hold her. BUT, we loved it. We got to interact with our little tiny, hold her and talk about how sweet she was, what a miracle she was and how we loved her SO much. Then we'd put her back in her isolette and go back upstairs to our hospital room where we hotel stayed for those three weeks. So, as the days went on we eventually missed one once in a while--mostly the middle-of-the-night feedings. Soon our exhaustion and the excellent nurses convinced us she was in perfectly capable hands--professional babysitters pretty much, and let's not forget, we were paying for them. There we were again sleeping through the night, and being COMPLETELY delusional about what exhaustion actually was. The morning the doctor called and told us we could take her home I was in the shower when it hit me--the restfull nights were over and I was about to become entirely responsible for this little girl. The first night was ridiculous. We were ALL up all night, even Hudson (although he has since found some way to block Adi's crying out completely--will wake from a dead sleep if I open a wrapper in case it's a treat--but doesn't even register baby screams). We've all adjusted since then, thankfully and the crazy thing about it is that I wouldn't trade the 3 a.m. visits for anything--not even for a full night's rest, or for the jurisdiction of my own schedule. I really can't imagine life without Adi. Not that the sleep won't be welcomed when she eventually sleeps through the night, just that I'm completely smitten by this little piece of heaven I get to hang out with around the clock.

Labor Pains...

2008-09-24T16:43:00.000-07:00

Yesterday was Adi's official due date. My mom called early in the morning to ask if I was having labor pains. Ha ha, very funny. When I look at this little 7 week old girl, though, I have to say I am having some growing pains--it's exciting to see her grow and change but it's hard to see it happening so fast, knowing it won't slow down. I can't believe how she's constantly changing. I really try to soak it all up and take it all in - every minute. I know someday this will all seem like a dream and I want to know I cherished all of it.

Adi's First Few Days

2008-09-20T18:03:00.000-07:00

Stinkin' Cute

2008-09-20T18:00:00.001-07:00

So, I used to cringe and roll my eyes when a mom walked in for a photo session with 15 outfits and ginormous headbands for a tiny newborn. Seriously, the baby looks the same no matter what you put her in. Kay, so I was wrong. I swore I'd never actually USE the headbands with flowers and bling. Being a mom does make you partial, though and so of course I think they're adorable on her. AND, I do love to dress her up. Poor thing sometimes wears two or three outfits a day. I feel justified though--her premies already don't fit. Good thing we changed so much--HA. Brent's mom asked me in the NICU if I liked playing with dolls, because I'd be doing that for a while since she was so tiny. I'm actually eating it up. Cute little girl. I really do just adore her.

Announcing...

2008-09-19T11:50:00.000-07:00

So, I have this stack of darling birth announcements on my counter, next to the thank you cards that are written (but not addressed), bills that need to be filed, and every other something I tell myself I'll take care of the next time Adi takes a nap. I realized the other day that she really has been born (and not officially announced) for 6 weeks and 1 day now, not just the three weeks we've had her home. SO, in order to buy myself some time, I'm posting them here. It's ridiculous how much she's grown just since these were taken. She's 5 lbs, 5 oz in these pictures, and she now officially weighs 7.5 lbs. Crazy! But I've decided she's darling at any size. Tuesday I'm taking pictures since it's her official due date. Pretty sure I would have been delivering an 8 lb. baby had she made her debut on time. I'm secretly thankful we saved that event for a later date. Suddenly my Frankenstein C-section scar isn't looking so bad. The girl's definitely not a procrastinator like her mom (as you all await the announcement's paper version...)

THE Craziest Six Weeks....

2008-09-15T16:42:00.000-07:00

Whew, this Thursday marks six weeks from Miss Adilyn's dramatic entry into the world, She's growing and doing so well. Idon't know when she changes, I peek at her all day--but everyday she looks bigger and older to me. She still is a tiny thing, but almost 7 pounds is a long way from 4 lbs 10 oz! Today she's 8 days from her official due date, and I seriously can't imagine still being pregnant. I must be a wimp. I blame it on the toxemia and decide it'll be a breeze next time. Good thing Adi agreed to come and be such a fighter--she saved us both. The nurses in the NICU nicknamed her "feisty" and "sassafrass." Hey, a girl's gotta do what a girls gotta do when she's born 6 1/2 weeks early.